It's all about the fishes !

Management decided that it was time they rewarded us for all the toil and labour we've done by treating us to a baseball game this weekend ( I would have preferred cash money of equal value to my tickets which I would have parted with at some bar somewhere but beggars are not choosers are they ? )

I invited two of my friends to go to the game with me, and they only agreed coz they heard there was free food and beer ( I'm not a beer fan- gimme the liquor ! ) the game was starting @ 7 pm so at arounf 4 I call my friends to confirm and friend A had to take a rain check last minute, so I call friend B and she was still coming, and when I told her I had an extra ticket she asked if she could bring two other friends which was cool since I knew my boss had extra tickets.

So we fika at the meeting place, friend B had brought her boyfie and a raia dude, pleasantries and introductions were exchanged and we headed towards the field to go watch the game. As afore hinted, I'm not a baseball fan and with that, I chose to sit next to my friend so we could catch up with stories and occasionally cheering whenever the peeps around us cheered !

After the game, raia whom I'll call Oduori ( yes, he was from Homa bay or somewhere near the vicinity ) suggested we all go for dinner,I was game for that since the hotdogs at the stadium sucked !
Now Oduori with all the mahewas of a jango, said ( and I quote ) " I know this fantabulous Italian joint" and he mentioned the name of the place......and I wondered to myself that's odd, why does the Italian joint have a french name ? ( FLAG NUMERO UNO )

Since I'd never heard of the place, I figured it was best to shut up and go with the flow. We decide we jus use on moti since we're all going to the same place and no sooner was the consensus reached...Oduori volunteered to be the designated driver ( Oh well, more power to you Oduori )

When we fikad his moti Iunderstood WHY Oduori had willingly agreed to be the shaufa ( chauffeur - for those who need fafanuarings ) before us, was a Mercedes Benz ( nani kama Oduori ? )
..oh and by the way jus in case u think Im being biased, friend B is from Western and cool as hell so don't crucify me on to the msalaba of tribalism and what not !

( I digress )

We fika the joint and I immediately notice the french theme settings in the restaurant ( Oduori si you said the place was Italian ?) and apparently ( per the Maitre'D in his snotty attitude ) its best to make a reservation to get a good table ..nyokonyoko yeye ! can we eat at this establishment or not ? after almost ten minutes of the maitre'd staring at some screen "trying to see how he can do some abracadabra fucking magic" the ngamia leads us to two separate tables since there were no tables available for a party of four.

So naturally friend B sat with her boyfie and I was with Oduori...when the waiter came to the table I was ready to order my drink, which I diid then the waiter turns to Oduori whos staring at the menu like he's about to get quizzed on it ( Oduori harakisha I need my beverage pronto ! ) he finally asks for water !!! yes water !!! so why were you studying/cramming the drinks menu ????
Even the waiter was kidogo flabbergasted !

This mama was hungry so I went thru the menu and after a couple of minutes I knew what I was goin to order , rabbit...... people, I havent had some since I came to Bushville and dammit there it was on a well described menu on how it's been cooked and all the trimmings that comewith it aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh I was in heaven !
Oduori was on round two of the staring game with the menu ( the house always wins dingbat !). If I sound angry, my apologies , I was beyond starving and times like these I tend to be very impatient.

The food was fantabulous ( quoting thyself ) ..convo was ok and by then since my hunger had been quelled by the rabbit, I was in a much better mood that when Oduori suggested ( again ) we all go for a movie everyone agreed. The theater was right next to the restaurant so we all walk there but I could sense the proud owner of the diesel fuelled Mercedes was a tad disspointed since he was ready and willing to drive us to the theater that was literally a stone throw away ( dude dont you realize how much gas/diesel is ? )

I offered to pay for the movie since he was kind enough to foot the dinner bill but Oduori would have none of it and almost stomped his tassel detailed shoes ( remember I happen to have a shoe thingy...) so I said "ooohh...your shoes" and I guess he took that as a compliment coz he proceeded to gleam and say ...I have two more pairs like these ( at this point hes pulled up his mfuto for me to further admire his shoes ...see below ) http://www.shoemall.com/assets/product_images/ZD04601115L.jpg friend B and I made eye contact and that was secret code for " we shall dissect this moment later like they do in a sports game and laugh our heads off "

We go in the theater and the movie begins and much to my annoyment dude decides this would be the best venue to further know me by talkin..not let me take that back...whisper, and ask me questions about myself (btw.. talking in the theater is one of my pet peeves ...just a fyi ) and to make matters worse, I was hit by the invisible wall of bad breath and this wasnt the bad breath coz of what you ate -
Nooooooooooooooo this was bad breath in its best form that colgate/pepsodent/closeup or laying of the hands in the mouth while some wailing preacher is praying for the demon of hellish breath to be cast out !!!auuiiiiiii and he's still insisting on making small talk and you know the proximity of one person to the next in a movie theater !!

( this begs for a listerine moment )

The thing is I never caught a whiff of his breath at any point earlier coz at the dinner table he was seated across me and during the baseball game I was seated next to friend B so I guess there was some catching up of his halitosis to be done and my olfactory senses bore the utmost brunt of it !! Lets jus say the movie seemed like a decade long.

Boy was I not happy when we stepped out of the theater I was more than ecstatic ...ooooh fresh polluted air ( the oxymoron sense in it was welcoming ) yes yes yes I love you ! ! now at this point Im ready to call it a night and head home - but wait there's more ( as those annoying informercial fuckers would quip ) Oduori wants us to go for a drink !!!!

La hasha ! not me ! I graciously declined the offer, thanked him for the dinner and movie, then muttered something about tomorrow being Mothers Day and I have to go walk Bosco the dog ( what does Bosco have to do with Mothers day ? was the expression written all over his face ) I donno either but I was not going to explain myself.

Not to be outdone...Oduori pulls out his PDA ...studies it for a ka minute then asks me " would you like to go see the fishes next weeekend" ?

The who ? fishes ? you mean the aquarium I ask ?

Yes, the fishes, Oduori retorts.... I told him I'd seen the "fishes" a couple of weeks prior and without batting an eyelash he asked " would you like to go see the fishes again ?"'
I let out an inward sigh and gave in to the offer coz I had this feeling that he would keep coming up with ideas and not take a NO for an answer.

With that in check, dude proceeded to pencil me in his PDA ( woohoo how fucking lucky am I to be in Oduori's PDA ?) and was like Saturday it is ! Meanwhile friend B and boyfie are silent witnesses to this whole thing and I know I will never hear the end of it from her. The friends I have ! who am I kidding ? I would rib her endlessly if it were her in my position .

I had fun besides the whole bad breath episode and I wait with baited breath we shall see how it goes with the date to go see the fishes ! ( I will come with a box of tic tacs/orbit ..anything )

To be continued................

PS
Friend B who tried to fix me with Oduori is a dental hygienist so imagine the irony of it all !!!!!!